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Serving Others: An Introduction


When you read biographies of great leaders, many of them talk about how they were shaped by experiences of serving others with their families. No matter the age of your child, volunteering as a family is a great way to spend quality time together while also shaping your child’s character.

Did You Know?

  • Young people who say their parents “spend lots of time helping others” are almost twice as likely to engage in service themselves.

  • Search Institute researchers have found that when kids serve others, their Developmental Assets are built. They also found that when you build kids’ Developmental Assets, they’re more likely to serve others.1

  • An Independent Sector study found that 67 percent of adults who remembered that their family volunteered when they were young said they now volunteer as adults. In contrast, only 42 percent of adults who did not remember volunteering with their family when they were young volunteer now.2

Serving others doesn’t have to take a lot of time. There are hundreds of ways to volunteer together as a family, ranging from quick projects at home to taking family volunteer vacations, making it easy to find one that fits your family’s needs.

Frequent Questions and Concerns about Serving Others

Why should we help others when our family is already so busy?

Volunteer work teaches family members the value of caring and giving back. Many families notice how much closer they become as a family when they start serving together—and how much more they appreciate what they have. Family members also become much more aware of social issues and feel empowered to make a difference by serving together. Many busy families who try serving others now say that family service is their number one priority—and their favorite family activity to do together.

How do you find volunteer opportunities?

Service opportunities are everywhere. The trick, however, is finding ones in which your entire family can get involved together. Once you’ve identified the type of organization or cause you’re interested in volunteering for, contact an organization near your home. Or check with your child’s school or your faith community. Many schools and religious communities have ties to service opportunities. Almost every major city has a volunteer coordination office. Check the phone book under “Volunteer Bureau,” “Volunteer Center,” or “Voluntary Action Center.” Or visit www.1-800-volunteer.org.

How can I find opportunities that work well with kids?

Some service projects are more family-friendly than others. Find out if the organization has worked with families before. (If they have, you’re more likely to have a positive experience.) Some organizations tend to work only with adults or only with kids. Schools, religious communities, and some nonprofit organizations have created service opportunities especially for families to do together. Ask around to find these.

How do we start if we’ve never done this before?

Most families feel apprehensive before doing their first family service project. They don’t know what to expect, and they fear that they’ll get into a situation that either overwhelms them or makes them feel uncomfortable. This is a normal reaction. If you can find a small, one-time project that’s created for families, you’re more likely to find other new families just like yours.

Finding Issues That Matter to You

You’re more likely to volunteer and keep volunteering if you find issues and projects that matter to you. For example, one family with teenagers was interested in technology. They liked taking photographs, working with soundboards, and doing video editing. They volunteered for a nonprofit organization that needed this type of assistance. Another family with young children helped out at an animal shelter once a month because everyone in the family loved cats and dogs.

  • Identify your family’s areas of interest. Talk to your family and determine which issues you are interested in and which activities you would like to engage in. Are you most concerned about low-income people, senior citizens, refugees, or homeless individuals? Or is your family more passionate about caring for abandoned animals or the environment?
  • It can be helpful to try a few different types of service or volunteering. Decide together the types of things you would like to try once, and start with those. Be sure to choose projects that allow every family member, regardless of age, to contribute in a meaningful way.
  • Actively involve children in choosing and planning service projects. Pay attention to what interests them and what they seem most concerned about, as those are areas in which they are likely to invest more energy. Give them responsibilities that match their abilities and interests.
  • Start looking for opportunities where you already have connections. For example, you may find appropriate family activities through a faith community (church, mosque, synagogue, temple, or other religious organization), workplace, or community or service organization.
  • If you have friends or family members who volunteer regularly, ask them if your family can join them sometime. Talk with other families about whether they would like to do something together.

Serving others as a family has many benefits, including setting a very good example for your children. Getting involved in a cause that your family feels strongly about will make it much easier to continue your service for many years to come.

Getting Started with Simple, Short Projects

Nothing will kill your family’s enthusiasm faster than becoming involved in a project that drains your energy and time. When you find short, easy service projects to do as a family, you’re more likely to feel energized, feel like you’re making a difference, and want to do more.

  • Start with projects you can do at home. For example, make cookies to deliver to a homebound neighbor or a grandparent in the hospital; assemble birthday bags to donate to a local food pantry; make blankets for a crisis nursery; or create greeting cards for hospitalized children.
  • Consider participating in a project on National Family Volunteer Day (the Saturday before Thanksgiving), or one of the other Seasons of Service days throughout the year. Many communities sponsor special activities on these days, making it easy to get started and to meet other family volunteers.
  • It is often much easier to join projects that are already underway. Read newsletters from your school, faith community, workplace, or other networks. They often include invitations to participate in one-time projects, such as a clean-up day or painting. They can be a great way to meet other families that are interested in volunteering.

There are many extensive, complicated projects you can work on, but it’s much easier to start with something simple and easy. You can certainly expand your service in the future—but for now, just find something small to introduce your family to volunteering.

Making Volunteer Time Meaningful

Once you find a project you’re interested in and you get started, what happens next? Besides completing the project, you can take some easy steps to cultivate other benefits of family volunteering.

  • Although you are spending the day working on a project, it is just as important to use this day as a way to get to know each other in new ways. While you are working, talk about why you are doing what you are doing. Talk about other experiences you have had as you work.
  • Sometimes you learn new things (and have a lot of fun) when you switch your everyday roles while you serve. If parents are used to being “in charge,” give responsibility for coordinating what your family does to a child or teenager. See what happens!
  • Get to know the people you’re serving—first, learn their names, what interests them, and some of their history. Share your own experiences, too. You are likely to discover interests and experiences that you have in common. Invite them to participate in the service project if they are not already.
  • Though it is important to stretch and try new things, it is just as critical to stay safe and not push too hard. Monitor everyone in the family and take breaks when needed. Be sure that all family members stay safe and are capable of taking on the assigned projects.
  • The other families who are participating in your volunteer project probably share some of your family’s values and priorities. Get to know them as you work together.
  • Check in with everyone in the family to make sure everyone is contributing meaningfully. Are they all finding ways they can participate fully? Or are some feeling that they are stuck with trivial tasks? In the case of the latter, think of creative ways they can participate more meaningfully. If necessary, talk to the event organizers to see if there are other more creative ways to accomplish the task or other projects that need to be done that would better suit your family member.
  • Depending on the project, interject some playfulness into it. Sing or hum. Play a short game of chase if kids start to lose interest. Laugh. Enjoy being together.

Instead of thinking about family service as added work, and another item on your busy schedule, think about it as you would any other family activity. Spend time together, get to know each other better, and have fun!

Reflect and Learn from Your Experience

Your family will get even more out of a volunteer project if you take the time to debrief your experience. Take time to talk about your family volunteer experiences. Research shows that reflecting on service projects is key to ensuring that children and teenagers learn from the experience.

  • Talk about your experience. What was each family member’s experience? Their feelings? Their thoughts? What suggestions do they have to improve the project for next time?
  • Many people find that the following three questions provide a helpful structure for reflecting on your family’s volunteer activities in ways that promote growth and learning:
    • What? What did you do together? Share all of the funny, sad, frustrating, and touching stories from the day.
    • So what? Why was your service important? How did it fit with the values and beliefs that are important to your family?
  • Now what? What will your family do as a result of this volunteering? Which kinds of activities do you want to do in the future?

By talking about your family’s volunteering, you can make sure every family member gets the most out of the experience. It doesn’t have to be an organized discussion—it can even be in the car on the way home from the project. No matter where you are when you talk about your service, make sure everyone gets to talk about the experience. You might be surprised at what you learn!

Serving Others: Summary and Next Steps

In today’s society, everyone is always busy. Parents are working more than ever. Kids have school, sports, clubs, after-school programs, and social lives. Sometimes it may feel that you barely get to see some of your family members. How can you possibly make time for serving others? Fortunately, volunteering as a family doesn’t have to take a great deal of time. And it has many benefits for all members of the family. Start small today and see where your service takes you!

Books Available from Search Institute

More Useful Web Sites

More Books You May Like

  • The Busy Family’s Guide to Volunteering — Whether you have a lot of time or a little, an older teenager or a young child, this book will help you find the right opportunity for volunteering as a family.

Take Action!

Are you ready to take your desire to serve your community to the next level? Visit the Spark Action Website for more information on how you can take action to improve policies and programs, and, ultimately, the fabric of our nation as a whole.