Know Why Some Kids Fight More than Others

Some kids seem to create conflict wherever they go, while others seem to rarely get into a scuffle. What’s the difference? And what can you do about it?

Thinking about Conflict

  • Know your child’s temperament. Some kids are more easy-going and flexible. Others are more intense and have high energy levels. By understanding your child’s temperament, you can be aware of what makes her unique while at the same time teaching her how to resolve conflicts well. Learn more about temperament from the American Academy of Pediatrics.
  • Know your temperament. If your temperament and your child’s temperament clash, you’re more likely to have more conflicts. Instead of being in a constant battle, learn how to step away and gain a sense of humor and playfulness about your relationships.
  • Monitor your child’s competitive nature. Some kids are highly competitive and will fight to win at all costs. Teach your child how to be competitive with himself and to be respectful of those he competes with.
  • Keep stress levels low. All kids are apt to create conflict when they’re stressed, just like adults. If your family is in a stressful situation that won’t be changing soon (such as a parent being unemployed or going through a divorce), keep talking about positive ways to cope.

Gaining insight into your child’s temperament will make it easier to understand why he gets into fights often—or rarely. Make an effort to understand what is causing the conflicts in your child’s life and do what you can to resolve those issues before they result in more trouble down the road.

 

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