Kicking and Screaming

Biting and Hitting

  • When young children get upset, they often bite, hit, kick, and scream. (And some can do so for long periods of time.) Give short, clear directives. “No biting.” “No hitting.” “No kicking.” “No screaming.”
  • Try to help your child calm down. Once he is calm, say, “You can be mad, but let’s talk about it. We don’t hit or kick when we’re mad.”
  • Always behave like an adult. You’re only making matters worse and setting a bad example if you bite, hit, kick, or scream back.
  • Teach simple problem solving. Biting and hitting usually occur when a child is angry and frustrated. Model ways for your child to solve difficulties without making a scene.

Crying and Tantrums

  • A lot of young children cry and throw tantrums when they become overwhelmed, overtired, or overly hungry. Make sure your child’s needs are met so she doesn’t have meltdowns.
  • Soothe your child in ways that he likes. Some crying children feel better when they’re held—or when they can snuggle—while others want some distance. If your child wants distance, stick close by to show your support.
  • Some children learn to manipulate adults by throwing tantrums, especially in public. Kids are quick to pick up on what they can do to get their way (and which things will upset parents). If your child is throwing a tantrum in a store, be sympathetic but firm. Say, “I’m sorry you’re upset. I’m not buying you that toy. We need to go now.” Work to keep calm, and gradually your child will become calm as well.
  • If your child has learned to get her way through tantrums, it may take a long time to teach her to act otherwise. Be patient. Be consistent. Over time, it will get better.


I have a child who cry for everything that I ask of him to do. He’s is almost 5yrs. Help….....:)

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All these questions on here why do you guys not answer any of them?

I have a 3 yr old who act up in school, throw tantrums, bite, hit, yell, says no to her teachers. But the problems is she does not do it anywhere else olny at school. I dont know if she just be tired or know if she acts up someone will come get her. What shall I do?? I tried everything rewards for good behavior, time outs, no sweets and etc. Feeling like im failing as a mother. Any ideals??

Never argue argue with a young child. Don’t ask why did you misbehave, they can’t tell you because they don’t know. It’s usually impulse with them. They can’t exercise self-control. That takes time to develop. distraction is a good tool. New games, etc
Forgive them. Separate the sin from the sinner. Say… I love you so much, but when you ( misbehave, touch dangerous things, scream etc) I feel sad, scared, etc. you can cry or scream as long as you like, but you need to do it in your room with the door closed. Then if course , check on them. When you’re finished screaming, crying … You may come out and I’ll give you another chance to do better. I’ll help you to make better decisions. When children make poor decisions, explain briefly.
Example: if you won’t brush your teeth, they may start to hurt. Limit sugar to the max!
The consequences can take a natural path. Give a child as many choices as possible. Of course close to your choices for them. Pick two school
Outfits and let them choose one. Use of a timer is a good tool. Don’t over use it. Take parenting classes!! If you suspect that something isn’t right with your child, obtain more than one opinion. Parents… Set the example. Pick up your clothes, practice nice quiet language, limit tv, other tech toys. Play outdoors with them, dress up , etc. usually for my 4 yr old an hr is enough. Depending in what the activity is. Soft soothing music also helps. Other times , dancing music is fun. Also… Zero caffeine! Some parents feed children drinks with caffeine in them. Make sure as much asyou can to stick to a reasonable bedtime. Tired children can be miserable. Most if all hugs, kisses, security, good sitters, and instill in them some spirituality. Be consistent, parents must be in the same page. Also applies to all relatives. We want our children to have a chance to be of good character, fun, likable etc.

We have a 3 year old that used to through a fit when she didn’t get Her way, by scratching us, hitting us or biting us. Now she does it to Herself. I am at my wits end and she is very intelligent.

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Ok So My Daughter is 3 And She Knows So Much She Counts To 100 No Pauses, Spells Her Name Bridgette Lol Not A Easy Name, Talks Very Clear, like Uses Big Word Like “Disgusting, Complicated,Over Reacting, And Omg I Can Go On For Hours, Knows How To Work Computer,Tablet,phone Ect… BUT,Says Horrible Things Like When Shes Mad Calls Me A idiot or Anyone Else Shes Mad at. She Doesn’t Have Temper Tantrums. But Reacts Like A teenager I know shes crazy spoiled but I still discipline her. How Do I stop the insults? and Also has she hit the milestones For Her Age?

she is 3.5. she screams at me all day. i fear that i most definitely taught her this by screaming at her father a lot in her first yrs. i have gotten better. i try to talk calmly and sweetly to her at all times. she screams and yells and acts snotty and super angry in almost everything she says to me. i feel she is throwing it back in my face b/c she has seen me act this way toward her father. i always think she is tired or hungry and it’s most always true but at the same time the anger in her eyes and voice scares me. maybe i have scarred her or taught her the wrong way to deal with emotions… i think it can be undone by being patient and calm… i know it will take time. it breaks my heart that i wasn’t mature enough or didn’t put her first enough to have never acted out in front of her. she loves me so much and knows i love her. i wonder if there is any other way i can get through to her so that she will understand; all you need is love.

My 3 year old hits kicks and is constantly cussing at school I have tried everything! Please someone help me I feel so defeated and I could just cry!

1. For attention. As soon as they trow a fit, tell them they will be getting time out if they don’t stop now. If they continue, and or amp it up take them to a quiet spot (your bedroom works great. Never their bed room, you don’t want them to hate their room.)

2. Being angry is ok, being frustrated is ok! Le your child be angry frustrated throwing fits is healthy at this age. Just don’t feed into it by yelling, hitting, screaming back, or otehr negative reactions. If you are say out at Target, tell them they need to calm down. And if they don’t stop what you are doing and take them back out to the car. Yes this is frustrating, but stick with it your job is to teach them how to behave.

Like with teaching my son to go to sleep in his own bed (he was 3) This took a sold month, of taking his had and bringing him back to bed. Over and over and again some times until 2am! (The tip I found online that worked was, don’t talk to them, don’t look at them, just take their hand and put them back to bead. Don’t feed it and they’ll stop.) You child will probably top sooner mines a good mix of temperaments, Finish, Germen, and Swedish.

And todays fit about cleaning up his toys (he’s 5 now.) Fake whine (it’s 10:am) I’m tired! Wah (fake tears) When I say a mess I mean huge mess cars and leggos all over the living room floor. So what happens as he still won’t clean them up, total flip out. So up stairs to trow his fit, then the time out finally starts. I mean what good is it to start the time out will hes still acting that way? That won’t reach him how to calm down. So 5 mins after the fix is done with.

Do hold in there, it’s had being a parent. All of you are saints, very time you bite your tongue and stay cool and calm your modeling good behaver for your kids. Durning their time out make a fast cup of ciffie, a bite of chocolate, something and breathe! Good luck!

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