Kicking and Screaming

Biting and Hitting

  • When young children get upset, they often bite, hit, kick, and scream. (And some can do so for long periods of time.) Give short, clear directives. “No biting.” “No hitting.” “No kicking.” “No screaming.”
  • Try to help your child calm down. Once he is calm, say, “You can be mad, but let’s talk about it. We don’t hit or kick when we’re mad.”
  • Always behave like an adult. You’re only making matters worse and setting a bad example if you bite, hit, kick, or scream back.
  • Teach simple problem solving. Biting and hitting usually occur when a child is angry and frustrated. Model ways for your child to solve difficulties without making a scene.

Crying and Tantrums

  • A lot of young children cry and throw tantrums when they become overwhelmed, overtired, or overly hungry. Make sure your child’s needs are met so she doesn’t have meltdowns.
  • Soothe your child in ways that he likes. Some crying children feel better when they’re held—or when they can snuggle—while others want some distance. If your child wants distance, stick close by to show your support.
  • Some children learn to manipulate adults by throwing tantrums, especially in public. Kids are quick to pick up on what they can do to get their way (and which things will upset parents). If your child is throwing a tantrum in a store, be sympathetic but firm. Say, “I’m sorry you’re upset. I’m not buying you that toy. We need to go now.” Work to keep calm, and gradually your child will become calm as well.
  • If your child has learned to get her way through tantrums, it may take a long time to teach her to act otherwise. Be patient. Be consistent. Over time, it will get better.
 

Comments

I have a child who cry for everything that I ask of him to do. He’s is almost 5yrs. Help….....:)

Hi Anonymous,

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You might find the following articles useful: http://www.parentfurther.com/blog/advice-parents-dealing-post-discipline…

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I have a 12 month old son who rocks his read knocking against mine, the couch or the floor when it seems that he is anxious. What could this be?

I have a 3 and 4 year old and when I say no they throw hours and hours of tantrums. What can I do?

My child wants to do things that are no-no’s (turning a light switch off and on over and over again, pulling the dogs tail, hitting on a glass table with an object) all the while looking at me. I am constantly correcting bad behavior…. Please help.
Anonymous

I have a child thats bitting, hitting, ect I dont know if its all her but every since school is out and her sister has a friend im always hearing her name only. Help!!

my child is 4 and stucks on her thumb and has to play with her belly. help how to stop this

My daughetr is 41/2 years and she always cry for no right reason, at home at friends house, at church, sometimes at school if she doesn’t get what she wants. she is the only on cring around her cusiens of same age and I don’t know what to do. Please help.

I had a Peds Doctor tell me the best way to get kids to stop performing is to remove the audience. If the parent simply turns their back so the child believes the behavior is not getting any attention usually it changes.

I have a three year old that does not seem to comprehend why he is being punished. We explain to him why he is going into time-out, then try to discuss why after too, but he cannot tell me why? He is repeatedly punished for the same offense and is now hitting and kicking. I have tried several different techniques, but am not having any success. Please help!

OK all of these story sound the same on what I’m going through, but what can I do if I give him my back and don’t pay no mind to his misbehavior. His screams get louder and stomps harder for mommy and daddy’s attention. What do I do when timeout, public spanking or taking him to the side to tell him what he did doesn’t work? I feel like he gets worst…...help meeee with my lil volcano: (

my 17 month old grandson has just started having tantrums and i know that it is normal , but he is hurting himself while having tantrums . When he is having a tantrum he will smack himself in the face and he just started to bang his head on floor and now he is biting himself. I have two grown kids and have never come accross this kind of behavior, we come from a very large family i have over twenty nieces and nephews and i have never ever seen this kind of tantrums , i just want to know how to help him. when he is having a tantrum i try to calm him down and he usually does but some times it gets worse and he will put the anger on whom ever is in front of him . 95% of the time he is super sweet and so smart but when he has a tantrum it gets violent on himself UGH !!! help

i am a preschool teacher and i have a three year old, who like to hit and kick the teachers and other students around him, i have had a conference with parent but nothing seems to be working with this child. Mom says at one point he is violent, then says he's not like that, Dad says that he doesn't act like this at home, its only at school. i have noticed that when he acts this way, it's because he did not get his way, so he starts to scream throw things and his shoes and like to hit adults, he has had to go home twice now and i dont want him to start using this as an excuse to go home, i started a star chart and he wants all the stickers i explain that the stickers are for when he does good things in class like sharing not screaming or hitting, he gets upset and throws himself on the floor because i didn't give him the stickers..what do i do now!!!.....Please Help...

My child is four.He throws a tantrum if the clothes i wear is not of his liking,asking me to change it even though i might be least comfortable in them. If i ignore he remains cranky till i change

My son is usallly well behaved. I had my cousiin watch him over night and now hes stomping screaming hitting.. I don’t underatand what is wrong.. he is almost 17 months

My son is almost 17 months. . He is usually a very well behaved kid. I had my cousin baby sit him over night and now he is screaming stomping kicking and hitting.. what is wrong with him??? Please help

I have 3.5 yr old son ,he’z very fusy about everything ,he cries alot and also used to say mein naraz hoon apse ,also very irritating about throughing goods at home.

my son is 3.5 years old and he is biting every one about small things!! and he is hitting too. and sometimes he says “ I am very angry do not call me I am very angry.”(!!!)
He makes me cry. help….

My daughter has 3.5 year old, she constantly likes to run away from us every chance
she gets she laughs because she things its funny. She has tried punishing her by
sitting her in a chair for “ time out” but she
still continues. She has been doing this since she startef to walk, once she almost got
got hit by a car. How can she get her to stop and I have the same problem with her since
I do the baby sitting please help.

My 41/2 yr old son recently started full time school ,He did Nursery at the same school and there was never a problem . Since starting full time in september we have had problem after problem he doesn’t pay attention won’t do as he is told , apparently hitting , pushing other children . However when he plays with family members or other children at home or otherwise we have no evidence of this behavior . I have had him say to me that he doesn’t want to go to school . I am baffled any ideas ?

My three year old is cursing biting hitting I have a son who has adhd and I think she is picking up his bad habbits . How can I raise twochildren with two different set of rrules

I have a 31/2 year old granddaughter I have had since she was 1. She refuses to listen to me at anytime. She is already very disrespectful. She is having some issues in day care due to following directions. I am lost as to what to do with her. I have done the time outs and talking but does not seem to work. I know she can be good she is at times. I have more bad days then good.

I have a 4 yr old boy that thinks he is the boss over all the other children. he trys to control there every move. also he becomes extremely upset to the point of yelling, and hitting at the child. when I go to correct to him, he is so upset that he won’t stop or listen to anything I say, I have to put him in his room, even when I hear him out, which I always do. I left him with the babysitter and the story goes that the kids was next door playing and they started to get on top of a car the oldest asked my son to get down and he refused, so she got him down and carried him into her mothers house, him screaming the whole way. In the house he was left..he got into the babysitters purse and found a box knife and cut her brand new couch. when I got there after getting the phone call she was not there and my son was left with her 14 or 16 yr old nephew. and the oldest came to me and said he did it because he was mad, and then told me the story. I will never in my life ask her to watch my child again. But my point is that I have no idea how to help my child understand that he can not act this way. I put my son in timeouts and talks, I also spank my son. but nothing is getting the point across.

I have a 5 yr old and cries over everything. I have constantly put her back in a time out she screams she cries and I feel so guilty when she says I don’t listen to her and that she doesn’t want me to give her anymore goodnight kisses. Please help me.

What if your child starts having them at 1 years of age? Every time I leave the room she starts crying and screaming and she does not stop I could be gone for an hour and come back and she is in the same spot crying what should I do to teach her it is okay if “mommy” leaves you for a little while with a familiar face?

All these questions on here why do you guys not answer any of them?

I have a 3 yr old who act up in school, throw tantrums, bite, hit, yell, says no to her teachers. But the problems is she does not do it anywhere else olny at school. I dont know if she just be tired or know if she acts up someone will come get her. What shall I do?? I tried everything rewards for good behavior, time outs, no sweets and etc. Feeling like im failing as a mother. Any ideals??

Never argue argue with a young child. Don’t ask why did you misbehave, they can’t tell you because they don’t know. It’s usually impulse with them. They can’t exercise self-control. That takes time to develop. distraction is a good tool. New games, etc
Forgive them. Separate the sin from the sinner. Say… I love you so much, but when you ( misbehave, touch dangerous things, scream etc) I feel sad, scared, etc. you can cry or scream as long as you like, but you need to do it in your room with the door closed. Then if course , check on them. When you’re finished screaming, crying … You may come out and I’ll give you another chance to do better. I’ll help you to make better decisions. When children make poor decisions, explain briefly.
Example: if you won’t brush your teeth, they may start to hurt. Limit sugar to the max!
The consequences can take a natural path. Give a child as many choices as possible. Of course close to your choices for them. Pick two school
Outfits and let them choose one. Use of a timer is a good tool. Don’t over use it. Take parenting classes!! If you suspect that something isn’t right with your child, obtain more than one opinion. Parents… Set the example. Pick up your clothes, practice nice quiet language, limit tv, other tech toys. Play outdoors with them, dress up , etc. usually for my 4 yr old an hr is enough. Depending in what the activity is. Soft soothing music also helps. Other times , dancing music is fun. Also… Zero caffeine! Some parents feed children drinks with caffeine in them. Make sure as much asyou can to stick to a reasonable bedtime. Tired children can be miserable. Most if all hugs, kisses, security, good sitters, and instill in them some spirituality. Be consistent, parents must be in the same page. Also applies to all relatives. We want our children to have a chance to be of good character, fun, likable etc.

We have a 3 year old that used to through a fit when she didn’t get Her way, by scratching us, hitting us or biting us. Now she does it to Herself. I am at my wits end and she is very intelligent.

my son is going to be three and he’s a handful. hes now doing this hug thing every time i put him in time out he desid to say i hug and he names who he wants to hug. its has becomes everyday is a new chore its really becoming a problem i am so unsure what to do any more. my sons dad is only in hes life over the phone for now and hes father thinks its funny. i’m just over the issues i want back in control over it and i don’t know how

I have a five and a half year old lil girl and she does the opposite that i say and is winny all the time what should i do? Please help!!!!

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